Knowing the Signs

The past few months have been very good for me. My depression and anxiety have been under control with medication and talk therapy. Equally important I have been using a cpap (breathing machine) to control my sleep apnea. It appears that sleep apnea was a major contributor to my depresssion. I've been feeling so good that my therapist and I have begun to meet monthly rather than weekly. Things are good.

Yet, the past couple of weeks I've noticed signs that could be an indicator of increased depression. As of yet I'm not sure if these are the simple ups and downs of normal life, or if they are symptoms to be addressed. Either way, I'm pleased that I know my warning signs. These signs are my friends.

The main sign for me is isolation. Lately I've found myself compelled to cancel plans. This is a big warning sign for me. When in the arms of depression I tend to isolate myself big time. I feel guilty and ashamed when I cancel plans. I want to be a man who keeps his word. Further, this keeps me from getting close to people. It is sabatoging behavior. Still, I'm in the early stages of this sign. As of yet I do not know if I've canceled plans simply due to being tired or if I'm avoiding people. I need to be aware within the next few weeks. Depression can sneak up quickly and quietly.

A secondary sign I've noticed is an increase in feelings of anger. These feelings do not come from outside of me, but rather through my internal dialogue or "tapes" of past events and imaginary conversations. It is an important sign to observe.

What are your signs? Even people without a mental health diagnosis have warning signs about their well-being. It is good to know the signs. Sometimes we need help to learn our signs. Therapy is wonderful for this. I pray you are well and that you know your signs. If you think of it, say a little prayer for me.

Thank you and God bless you.
Brian